When it comes to the relationship between a girl and the mother of a boyfriend or groom, there is often a little tension. These complex relationships between two ladies have not lost their relevance for many centuries, and a huge number of anecdotes, folk wisdom and proverbs are a great proof of this.
In this article, we will look at the etiquette of meeting parents, the first meeting, or rather, its physical and emotional aspects.
We will not consider situations where there is an interracial, cultural, age, ideological gap between two hearts in love. Let's take a standard couple, with a more or less similar outlook.
First of all, you need to understand that the very offer of meeting your parents should come from a guy. Why is it important?
The situation when a young man was forced to introduce his girlfriend to his parents, most often leads to negative consequences. Therefore, it is necessary to be sure that acquaintance is really an act of goodwill.
Of course, in the heart of every girl, after an invitation to meet the groom's parents, anxiety creeps in. Fear is caused by several factors:
Therefore the phrase : I'm afraid to get acquainted, this is the first thing a girl can say after realizing where her beloved person invited her.
Simple advice: yes, relax, don't worry, don't worry, etc. are very easy to say, but incredibly difficult to follow.
What to do? How to get acquainted with parents, when, even just admitting these thoughts, a very strong excitement begins, legs turn to stone, the heart is pounding madly, and the tongue treacherously confuses words.
Getting to know a guy's parents is a very exciting moment. At the first meeting with the family of their chosen one, many girls think about how to please his parents, create a good relationship with them and make the right impression. So that your first acquaintance with them does not turn out to be the last, I will give some very valuable tips.
If you've been dating for a long time, and the guy trusts you completely, this is a good sign for the development of your relationship. If not, you should be well prepared. After all, the first acquaintance always subconsciously causes excitement, and following my advice, you will feel more confident.
How to behave to please his parents?
- Be punctual. Try not to stay late, but you don't need to arrive much earlier either. This situation will create some discomfort and tension.
- Be yourself. It makes it easier for his parents to like him. Do not overplay or give inaccurate information about yourself. Excessive excitement and pretense in communication is felt by people subconsciously and, as a rule, is determined immediately.
- Choose beautiful and feminine clothes. Candid and overly sexy outfits should be postponed. Parents of a guy are pleased to see when a well-groomed and attractive girl is next to their son.
- Pay attention to makeup. His parents are unlikely to like a girl with "war paint". Your face is a business card, at this moment you should not look flashy, try to slightly emphasize your dignity. Use a fresh unobtrusive perfume.
- Communicate culturally and watch what you talk about. The slang inherent in the youth environment is not always clear to the older generation, therefore, for a conversation, you should choose topics that will be comfortable for both sides to talk about.
- Politeness and demeanor is one of the most important criteria. Respect for elders and standard rules of etiquette are the best helpers in deciding how to please his parents.
- At the first meeting, try to seem ordinary. At this point, you do not need to demonstrate your talents and awards. Better surprise his parents with this after a couple of months of dating.
- Try to be nice and be able to keep up the conversation on any topic. Be kind to their son. Every mother will be pleased to see and know that there is someone to take care of her son, to feed him deliciously. Let him know that you are exactly the girl next to whom he is cozy and comfortable, then his parents will not be difficult to please.
- Buy, preferably with a guy, a small present in the form of a good wine or a box of chocolates. Do not spend money on expensive gifts, at this stage, this is superfluous.
Be ready for any turn of events!
If you are thinking about how to please his parents, then you are serious about your relationship. Discuss with the guy in advance what the format of the meeting will be and where it will take place.
Ask the guy about his family. Ask about their hobbies, work and family traditions. When meeting, do not bring up topics that might be unpleasant for them.
Most importantly - do not worry and be prepared for judging looks. You must understand that his parents are in a position when they hand over their beloved child to you, so making sure that you are a good girl is their responsibility.
Tune in to the fact that, perhaps, you will not immediately be accepted as a native. Many older people take a long time to get used to the idea that they have another relative to be reckoned with.
Do not be nervous and do not give marks and characteristics after the first dose. Even if his parents liked you, they will not necessarily praise you and shower you with compliments, because, believe me, they worry no less than you.
Be patient and do not tell your loved one what was wrong. Try to leave unnoticed some of the mistakes made. Be tactful in your communication and don't be intrusive.
Question: "How to please his parents?" relevant at all times. Every girl strives to make a good impression and be accepted. The main advice is to smile more and listen. Let his parents be the initiators of the conversation. Answer the questions and speak confidently about yourself. Try to find common ground and keep the conversation going by being yourself. To be self-confident, to communicate easily and naturally, the training book “Lady-Confidence” will help you, which tells how to increase self-esteem and start getting everything from life and from men!
First meeting with the boy's parents
If you decide to have a serious relationship with a great guy, sooner or later you will have to get to know his parents, and in general with all relatives. But first, of course, mom and dad. There are things that you can and should do and that you should not do.
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Remember that this evening will allow you to learn a huge amount of information about the guy. You can hear interesting facts, so you need to be very careful. They will help you further successfully and without huge problems to develop relationships and forget about any problems. About those that could arise or have already arisen.
Probably, every girl wondered what to give the parents of her beloved boyfriend for the first acquaintance. Which choice will be right, flowers or sweets or both. Many people think that coming to visit without a gift is impolite. And on the one hand, this statement is true, but on the other hand, it is important not to overdo it, and to please, and not vice versa.
But in fact, you must be sure of the gift, because otherwise, there is no need to give it at all. You still do not know exactly about the taste preferences of your future mother-in-law and father-in-law, so be careful. The very attitude towards gifts is also important, if they do not like to receive them, it is better not to do this. In any case, before making a decision, it is better to consult with your loved one, he can definitely tell you what to do and how to act.
c"> What to say when meeting a guy's parents?
Another problem that arises at the first meeting with the parents of a beloved boyfriend. At the same time, a huge number of very different questions arise, how to behave, what to do and say. The main thing is not to panic and not be nervous. First, remember that it is better to come with your boyfriend, so it will be much easier and more comfortable for you.
Try to 100% control your emotions and figure out a beautiful smile on your face. Show me all 32 beautiful snow-white teeth. You must demonstrate how friendly, kind and open you can be. No need to put on a mask of emotions, be real. But do not try to please everyone and everyone, do not use the usual words that you use to communicate with friends, be extremely frank. But remember that what matters most to your mom is your main goal.
This is a standard situation, each of the family members listens to the opinion of the main woman, and this is your boyfriend's mother. Therefore, when you come to their house, offer to help in the kitchen, even if you see that it is completely unnecessary. She needs to understand that you are the perfect person to take care of her son and grandchildren in the future. After all, she protected her only son for a very long time, whom she must now transfer into the hands of a completely unfamiliar girl.
So, now you are familiar with all the tricks that you can and should use when you first meet your lover's parents. But if you're not ready, think about hinting to the guy about it. Or get ready for a significant event that can decide a lot in your life.
It is worth noting that if your boyfriend decided to introduce you to his parents, this already says a lot. Most likely, he has very serious intentions and this can only be rejoiced at.
But this will cause much more excitement, because it is so responsible and you want to please the relatives of the chosen one. You should not be afraid, because your boyfriend's mom and dad are ordinary people and they are probably also very worried before meeting you.
There are several rules that it will be useful to use when meeting the parents of your beloved soulmate. In addition, you should understand why it is so important to make a positive impression.
Of course, if relatives do not treat you very well, this does not mean that he will immediately refuse you, but it is still desirable to make a good impression on relatives, since, most likely, something more will follow the acquaintance and that is why your boyfriend so it is necessary that relatives get to know you and appreciate you.
In addition, this is important for you, because talking alone with your man, you do not have a complete idea of what family he was brought up in, what kind of relatives he has. You will be able to more clearly understand what kind of family model is considered normal for your man and understand if you like it.
In advance, you can find out from your loved one what his parents are doing and what topics it is better to talk with them so as not to touch on those that should not be touched. Remember that there are topics that, in principle, should not be discussed with any unfamiliar people, especially at the first meeting (religion, politics, nationality, etc.).
You should not expect that now every week you will be expected to visit your man. If you are not invited to visit for a long time, this does not mean that you are not liked. So don't beat yourself up.
Also, you should not constantly ask a man about what impression you made on your relatives, he himself will tell everything that he sees fit. Yes, and the guy will always be seen whether he is satisfied with the result of the meeting or not.
Many expect that after meeting their parents, an offer from the chosen one will immediately follow. Moreover, it cannot be rushed. Everything should go measuredly and in its own way, so do not insist on anything, the initiative should come only from your loved one.
Thus, getting to know your parents is indeed a very important stage in a relationship. It depends on how they will develop further. The more trusting relationship your young man has with his parents, the more important his opinion is for them, so try to show your best side.
Getting to know the guy's parents cannot be avoided if the relationship becomes more and more serious. While it can be quite an exhilarating process, all you have to do is take steps to make a good first impression, be polite, and be yourself when interacting with them. Don't worry too much, as they will most likely be nervous too!
Arrive at least 10 minutes early. Being late for the first meeting will make a negative impression on the guy's parents. In order not to be late in any case, try to arrive early. This never hurts, as it gives you time to help out if they're cooking dinner for you, or flipping through the menu if you're meeting at a restaurant.
Bring a small gift for the boyfriend's parents. Ask the guy if his parents have any special preferences and choose what he suggests. For example, find out the type of their favorite chocolate, wine, or cookie. You don't have to buy anything if you're on a budget. You can just bake something for them.
Dress according to the environment and the tastes of your parents. Ask the guy in advance what the standard dress code is for a similar event in his family. If you're just going out to dinner but aren't sure what his parents will like, dress smartly and a little conservatively.
Compliment your boyfriend's parents. Everyone loves to hear nice things about themselves, and compliments will demonstrate your courtesy. If you are going to visit, it will be very easy to come up with praise. Compliment your home, garden (if available), decor, and more. You can also compliment his parents' style of dress, the food (if they prepared it), or the place where they suggested they dine.
Involve everyone at the table in the conversation. You might want to focus on the guy or just his mom or dad, however if his siblings are also present, it's important to make sure everyone feels like they're part of the conversation. His parents will notice that you have made time for all family members, and other people at the table will be more inclined towards you.